Is Patriarchy Better Than Matriarchy?

In all this data concerning fathers, does that mean the opposite is better? Only fathers should bring the kids to church? Should only men be the ones to function in a Christian way, in family and the church?

No, and that’s not what I’m getting after. A matriarchal structure of church governance and mothers solely leading their children to church won’t build strong churches or many church-going children as they grow into adulthood. But a patriarchal form and function is just an error in the opposite direction.

The first narrative of the creation teaches us, “then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.’ So, God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. And God blessed them. And God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.’ … And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day.” [Genesis 1:26-28, 31]

God created Mankind, male and female, in His image of perfection and holiness. We were made to have dominion over the whole earth without sin. That is to say, we were to have dominion without the inclination to domineer over the earth. This is a concept we can hear, but it doesn’t flow easily into our understanding. The corruption of sin in the earth makes dominion a burden in which we engage. Creation itself also battles against the dominion. It’s in the curse, thorns and thistles resist us.

“The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it. … Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.’ Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens… But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, ‘This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.’ Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” [Genesis 2:15, 19a, 20b-24]

The expansion of the sixth day narrative teaches us more about God’s love for mankind. He created us with a different care and detail than the beasts of the field. He made us incomplete by ourselves. The man, stronger and bolder, is made to toil, lead, provide, and protect. The woman, less strong and more gentle, is made to bear, nurture, produce, and protect. The roles of man and woman are different, complimentary, and only complete in each other.

I’ve used the protection descriptor in both cases on purpose. One of the best descriptions of the complimentary interrelation of women and men comes from a deaconess friend of mine. She says it’s out of Luther. But, I can’t corroborate yet. Someday I shall.

This is a paraphrase of the description: woman was made out of man, weaker, smaller, more in need of protection. She is taken from under his arm. Her place is there, under the protective, strong arm of her mate. The man is incomplete by himself too. In his strength, he has no protection from the hole in his side. His mate, under his protection guards his heart. The two have different and complementary roles. The one flesh is stronger and more capable to have dominion over the earth.

Relative to all of that, one of the foci of the reinvigoration of fatherhood as a critical function in the life of the church needs to be the whole family. The intended result is strong, faithful Christian families. That means Mom and Dad together with the kids on Sunday morning. Both teaching the kids to follow along, sing along, and participate through the hymns and liturgy. In repetition, the kids will memorize liturgical songs and some hymns too.

This conclusion comes out of the original data set too. Fathers are the stronger individual influence. BUT, mothers and fathers together are still 7% more influential than that solo paternal influence. Mom & Dad deliver a high-water mark of 74% of the kiddos growing into church attending adults. The very best thing we can see among our families is Fathers leading their whole family into regular, active church attendance.

Strong Christian parents, together, raise faithful Christian children.

Rev. Jason M. Kaspar
Mt. Calvary Lutheran Church & Preschool
La Grange, TX